How the Mentor-Mentee Relationship Helps You Evolve as a Clinician

Some years ago, a mentee of mine was returning from maternity leave. She told me she felt like she was not “doing enough” on her research project. I reminded her that she a) just had a baby, b) was doing a lot of clinical care, and c) was starting a new educational administrative job. After this aha moment, we both agreed to spend as much time focusing on what she had done as what she needed to do in our meetings.

When we debriefed a year later, my mentee commented that this reframe was instrumental for her mental health and productivity; rather than beating herself up about what she hadn’t done, she could acknowledge what she had done and feel energized to keep working.

This is just one of many stories I have about mentorship and its importance. Within health care, regardless of your specialty or discipline, the benefits of working with a mentor are plentiful. People who work with a mentor are more engaged and more successful in their jobs.

Research also suggests that mentoring is specifically valuable in the palliative care field as a way of providing holistic support to clinicians. Essentially, a mentor can help a palliative care clinician grow, become more confident, and get better at their job. This mentor-mentee relationship helps mentees develop and enhance their clinical skills, and hone the appropriate attitude in caring for seriously ill patients. Mentoring is particularly important to give women and clinicians from under-represented groups the support to succeed.

The first step is to identify the right mentor.

It’s important to be clear about your expectations. Start with some self-reflection by taking time to think about the state of your career and the direction you’d like to take. Do you want to grow in your clinical work, develop as an educator, or become a better administrative lead?

Then, figure out what you want to receive from a mentor-mentee relationship—and how this will help you achieve your goals. Do you want someone to sponsor you for awards or research projects, help you reflect on how to improve interactions with patients and colleagues, or something else? That knowledge will help you determine what kind of mentor to seek and what you hope to accomplish. (Of course, you may be unsure of your direction and a more experienced mentor may help you figure this out.)

Then, see who may be available both within your own institution and nationally. While I like the face-to-face nature of mentoring, expanding beyond your institution may provide a greater variety of potential candidates for the best possible match.

A caveat to keep in mind: just because you find someone you want as a mentor does not mean they will agree to do it. There’s a chance they may say “no” since it’s a time commitment or for other reasons. In the case that someone declines, just thank them for their honesty and move on.

Since palliative care is an interdisciplinary specialty, you can benefit from choosing a mentor from a different discipline. For example, a nurse practitioner could seek out a physician, a social worker could seek out a nurse practitioner, and so on. (That said, there is also value to working with someone from your own discipline as they may better understand your particular career challenges.) If you're reading this as a non-palliative care clinician, do what feels best and appropriate within your specialty.

I also suggest seeking out more than one mentor since one person cannot meet all of your needs. In fact, research confirms the benefit of seeking out multiple mentors. You could seek out a clinical mentor, a research mentor, and perhaps an overall career mentor, all of whom can provide different types of guidance to you.

Finally, before approaching a possible mentor, do some investigation. It may be useful to talk to other people they have mentored to try to determine if it is a good fit. Then set up a meeting to talk about what your goals are and if they are able to mentor you.

In early meetings, make sure you spend time talking about how to work together. Learn what your mentor expects, as well as their preferences regarding meetings, how they like to be contacted, etc. As an example, I like to be prepared, so I ask mentees to submit an agenda a day or two prior to our meeting and send a summary after each meeting. I also ask mentees to send me things they want me to comment on two days before our meetings. Your mentor may have different expectations or prefer unstructured meetings. Over time, you will establish a process that works for both of you.

As for timing, do what works best for you. At a minimum, I recommend having quarterly check-ins so too much time does not pass.

And, if you have multiple mentors, you might sometimes receive conflicting feedback. In this case, it may be useful to have a meeting with all your mentors to hear them discuss their different views together. However, in the end, you are responsible for your career. Thank them for their feedback and make the best decision for yourself.

You may be reading this as someone who’s benefited from having a mentor. Consider returning the favor and taking on the role of a mentor for a less-seasoned palliative care specialist. If you can do it, you’ll have the satisfaction of knowing that you’re helping someone else.

Serving as a mentor for someone from an underrepresented group in health care is especially valuable from an equity perspective. Research suggests that the physician workforce continues to have a disproportionally low number of clinicians from racial and ethnic groups underrepresented in medicine, and mentorship helps with retention.

At some point, you may decide the relationship has run its course, at which time you can thank your mentor for their time and stop meeting. However, never stop looking for new mentors. Even if you are mid-career, there’s much that you can gain. For example, you might want to seek out a leadership role, and they can help you chart a path forward in that direction. Mentors, at any stage, will help you grow and improve.

Edited by Melissa Baron. Clinical review by Andrew Esch, MD, MBA.